If Christ were here, there is one thing he would not be: a Christian.
-Mark Twain
Lord Galen
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April 1, 2012

Dear Galen (what a silly name!),

Did you ever go to a party, and when you got to the party, you just knew you had to be there? You know, when you're the life of the party? I'm always the life of the party. I'm Ponyville's Prime Party Planning Pony after all! OhohOH! Did the party have cakes? What kind of cake? Cupcakes, cheesecakes, layered cakes, chocolate cakes, strawberry cakes, black forest cakes, sponge cakes, cakes with little ponies on top? I love those cakes. Nice and tasty. What about decorations? Balloons, streamers, confetti, ribbons, party hats? Party hats! Gotta have party hats! A party's not a party without party hats! You should really come to one of my parties sometime. Like I said, I'm the pony who plans parties here in Ponyville. Can you make it to Equestria? By train? By boat? What about by airship? I love riding on airships! They don't have them in Ponyville, but in Canterlot, they're flying all over the place! And they go wicket fast, too. So intense! Maybe I'll make you a batch of cupcakes when you get here! Oh, and can't forget the Welcome Wagon! Everypony loves the Welcome Wagon! Don't worry, I'll remember to put the cake and confetti in the right place this time. But you gotta admit, Cranky's face was kind of funny! OH, I also keep extra presents around Ponyville, in case of present emergencies, so you'll got a nice shiny new gift thingy if you show up! So will you come to Ponyville? I'm sure all the other ponies would be glad to meet you, will you? Willy you? Huh? Huh? Huh???

Pinkie Pie

Dear Pinkie,

I would love to come to one of your parties. My favorite cake is German Chocolate. Sorry, but I can't *stand* cupcakes. I do like pound cake, though. Oh, and my favorite kind of sweets are Mr. Goodbar and Reese's Pieces, if you can get those in Equestria.

Love and Tolerance,
Lord Galen

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