Those who make peaceful revolution impossible will make violent revolution inevitable
-John F. Kennedy
Lord Galen
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Let's See You Be Gay
August 3, 2011

No beating around the bush for this one. I'm getting straight to the point. The very religious and very anti-gay are always making the claim (or at least the assumption) that being gay is a "lifestyle choice."

Fine. Being gay is a choice? Then CHOOSE to be gay. Right now. If it's possible to choose homosexuality, then I want you to show me. I want you to choose to be gay right fucking now.

Your first instinct is to recoil from this. Oh sure, being gay is a choice, but you'd never MAKE that choice! Isn't that the whole point? That being gay is a choice and YOU made the RIGHT choice?

Ok, but here's the thing: It ISN'T a choice. And if it IS, then you CAN choose it and you can do so right now in front of several witnesses and on camera to be uploaded to YouTube. Do it! Put your money where your mouth is, big studly Christian man! In fact, I'll make it easy on you. You don't even have to DO anything gay. Nope. All I ask is for you to enjoy a homosexual fantasy. I mean, since you can CHOOSE to be gay then you should be able to make a conscious CHOICE to be gay for just a few minutes and then CHOOSE to be straight again. Oh hell, you can even choose to be bi-sexual and have someone of the opposite sex in your fantasy too!

The reason I'll accept a fantasy instead of any real proof (like uploading a gay act to YouTube) is because of the main purpose of this site. I'm here to make you THINK. Now, you can give me all kind of excuses as to why you would never make such a choice even though you can. You can tell me all about not sinning on purpose and your devotion to Jesus makes it impossible for you to willingly choose to be gay, even for a short time. You can lie to me, but you can only TRY lying to yourself and you will FAIL at it.

No matter how much you protest. No matter how many "reasons" you give for why you "won't" do this, inside the confines of your own mind and heart you know the truth as well as I do: You CAN'T do this. As in, it isn't POSSIBLE. You'll hem and haw and give religious excuses and "my heart is filled with Jesus, that's why it's impossible for ME to make this choice, it's different for sinners."

Now here's how I know that's bullshit.

See, I'm an atheist. I'm as completely seperate from your god as anyone could possibly be. Jesus isn't in MY heart and he's not directing MY decisions. God isn't making any choices for me OR preventing me from making any myself. Yet, somehow, even without "Jesus in my life" I still find that's it's impossible to consciously choose to be gay. I asked some other atheists too. They ALSO found it impossible to choose homosexuality. So do people who belong to religions that don't worship your god. So do people who worship Satan. So you're really going to sit there and tell me that Jesus prevents ALL of THOSE people from making that choice? And, if he does, then just what the hell happened to free will?! In fact, I could ask the same question about YOU, good Christians. God isn't supposed to interfere with your choices or your ability to make them, so if you find that you CAN'T choose to be gay, then how can that be because of "Jesus in your heart?" By your own beliefs, your god and your savior will NOT do anything to prevent you from choosing to be gay!

So, I once again make the same demand of you: CHOOSE to be gay, right this very minute! If it CAN be done, then DO IT! Show me, you fucking retard! That's right, you still CAN'T. Don't bother saying that you WON'T - you CAN'T.

As a matter of fact, let me make this even EASIER for you! Let's pick anything you don't like. Say, a food you don't like. For me, I'll go with cabbage, cuz that shit's nasty. You choose your own food. Now, I'd like to see you CHOOSE to like that food. Let's try something a little more relevant. Think of the person you love, have a crush on, masturbate to, whatever. Now, I want you to CHOOSE to not give a shit about that person. What's the point? The point is that you can't even make a "lifestyle choice" about arbitrary and meaningless likes/dislikes, just how the fuck do you think it's possible to choose something as big as who or what you're sexually attracted to, you goddamn idiotic waste of oxygen?!

The last time I used this line on an anti-gay Christian, their response was "You don't choose to be straight because it's natural. Being gay is unnatural so you have to choose to go against the will of God." First of all, that response isn't even a response to what I actually said. Second, fuck you, here's a reply from me anyway:

Homosexuality DOES exist in the animal kingdom. It DOES exist among the other species on this planet. You can't call something "unnatural" when it exists in nature, you moron! And y'know what else is funny about that? As you go higher on the evolutionary ladder, you find more and more gayness in animals. The majority of homosexuality on this planet comes from humans, lower primates (chimps, gorillas, etc), and dolphins. It's funny how, on the evolutionary scale, the smarter things get the gayer they are! Hell, I'm surprised I'm not absolutely flaming considering that I'm smarter than damn near everybody. Maybe I'm in the closet? Ah hell, lemme just go ahead and choose to be gay, right now, so it'll make sense.....

Hmmm... Ok, lemme try this again....

Well, fuck! What's wrong here?! I don't seem to be able to choose to be gay, no matter how hard I try! BUT THAT CAN'T BE, SINCE HOMOSEXUALITY IS A LIFESTYLE CHOICE, ISN'T THAT RIGHT YOU FUCKTARDS?!

Let's review:
• It isn't possible for you to choose to be gay
• It isn't possible for me to choose to be gay
No one has ever demonstrated an ability to choose their sexual attraction
• It isn't even possible to make a conscious choice about the LITTLE things.
• Homosexuality isn't unnatural because it DOES exist in nature.
• You are a spineless fucking jackass.
• I just wrecked your argument.

And that's what happens. See, you're Stupid but I'm Anti-Stupid. It's kinda like matter and antimatter. When my antistupid comes in contact with your stupid, it's gets fucking annihilated! The difference is that my antistupid remains strong and doesn't go any-goddamn-where.

Asking you to think about what I've said would be asking too much. I know you're incapable of that. So instead, I'll just ask you to shut the fuck up and let the grown-ups talk. Thanks.

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