If people are good only because they fear punishment and hope for a reward, then we are a sorry lot indeed.
-Albert Einstein
Lord Galen
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No Self-Defense Against Parents
November 30, 2008

The following rant is based on this news story:
Deputies: Girl Punched Dad During Spanking
16-Year-Old Charged With Domestic Battery

CRESTVIEW, Fla. -- A 16-year-old Florida girl who hit her father when he tried to spank her has been charged with misdemeanor domestic battery.

An Okaloosa County Sheriff's Office report said the father told a deputy that he was attempting to spank the girl when she turned around and struck him in the face with her fist.

The report said she tried to hit him several more times before leaving with friends.

Both father and daughter said the argument started over an item that had been broken. She acknowledged that when he went to spank her, she punched him, the report said.
[ Source ]

That's right, kids, you heard correctly! Even though you're sixteen years old, physically an adult, and well beyond the years when all but the most whacked-out retarded spanking advocates think it's ok to spank you, you'd better not dare defend yourself when your parents try it!

Let's just take a few minutes here to back the bullshit truck up, shall we? I mean, maybe I'm looking at this all wrong. It's entirely possible that the slow-witted, ass-backwards, primative little ape-like hillbilly fucks in Crestview, Florida know more than I do. So let's not get too far ahead of ourselves before condemning these actions. Let's close our eyes (figurately, you moron, you still have to read this) and try to reconstruct the scene in our minds to find what we surely must be missing. After all, the authorities certainly wouldn't act so hastily and in such a seemingly retarded fashion as this, right? There must be something we've missed!

So here we are, in the home trailer of sixteen year old Missy Sue and her dad, Billy Bob. Missy Sue has just accidentally broken her dad's favorite ceramic spitoon (that his beloved Mammy passed down to him) and gotten icky black chaw juice all over the brown shag carpet that Billy Bob just put in last year after he found it on the side of the road.

Billy Bob: Missy Sue, you git yer ass back here and clean dis shit up, rite now!
Missy Sue: Daddy, I cain't, I'mown be late fer my date with Jessie Lou! I cain't be late fer the barn daince, you kno dat!
Billy Bob: Girl, I told you to clean dis shit rite fuckin' now! Now I ain't gon' tell you again, little miss! Don't make me take my belt off, girly!
Missy Sue: You better not touch me, Daddy! I'll knock yo last tooth out, I sware to God!
Billy Bob: I 'on't know who in the fuck you think you are, sassin' me like that! I'm fixin' ta tan yo hide!

*Billy Bob whips his belt off and moves toward Missy Sue
*Missy Sue punches her dad right in the nose.
*Billy Bob calls the cops like a fucking pussy cuz he can't handle a 16yo girl by himself.

All joking aside, let's do consider the real facts of this case for a moment. The chances are great that the girl's father was likely twice her size and/or strength. This adult male was closing in on an unarmed sixteen year old girl. He most likely carried a weapon (a belt, fly swatter, or a "switch") having stated or conveyed his clear intention to inflict pain and/or bodily harm against her. And let's keep in mind, that he intended to inflict this pain against his own daughter - a weaker and presumably defenseless opponent - due to the destruction of a physical thing, some broken item that should be of far less value and importance than the emotional and physical well-being of his own child. Scared and cornered, this girl reacted out of her fear and anger by attacking. Her father, now having been put in his place the way all bullies should be put in their place, calls in the cops. The cops, of course, slap the cuffs on this young girl and haul her away for "domestic assult."

A few questions. First, what about the dad's attempted assault? Was the girl not acting in self-defense by fighting back? Perhaps she did commit domestic assault, but what about the dad's own attempt at committing the exact same crime?

Sadly, I have the answers to these questions already. A quick look at Florida laws regarding the physical disciplining of a child reveal that, basically, the courts don't give one tiny drop of bird shit unless or until the child has been beaten badly enough to leave marks or permanent injury. So under Florida's stupid fucking redneck laws, parents can hit their kids all they fucking want (just don't leave evidence, mom and dad!) and the kids who hit back are criminals.

This is a disgrace. It is an embarrassment to every intelligent and civilized being walking the Earth that this is allowed to continue. Hitting someone to get you to do what they want is barbaric and primative and, as such, should only be used against those who are themselves barbaric and primative. Most toddlers, for example, cannot understand logic and reason, so I can understand swatting a child's hand to insure that they associate pain with a particular action. Very young children are expected to be both barbaric and primative, having not learned socialization and higher order reasoning skills.

A sixteen year old girl is not, however, a primative or barbaric creature (no matter what the media - both liberal and conservative - would have you believe). A sixteen year old girl is fully possessed of the reasoning and understand capabilities of any adult. No, she doesn't have the experience on which to base that intellectual process that most adults are expected to have, however that is completely beside the point. The point is that she is capable of understanding something OTHER than violence. She is capable of learning from something other than base stimuli like pain ("negative reinforcement"). Being that she is capable of such intellectual learning, it is not reasonable to resort to lower forms of conditioning; in fact, it is detrimental and most often LESS effective!

Yes, you heard me, LESS effective! Once a human being reaches the age of 4 or 5, they have sufficient reasoning skills to understand and follow instructions. Before that, perhaps they don't (not always the case, but go with it) and it may be neccesary to inflict mild to moderate pain to teach a lesson. When a 2yo reaches for a hot stove, for example, no amount of telling them that it will hurt or that they shouldn't do it is going to stop them. Your choices are to either inflict a little pain by slapping their hand and telling them "no!" or to allow them to gain the experience themselves by touching the stove and experiencing a great deal more pain. Most parents would rather inflict a little pain to spare their kids a lot of pain. This is a neccesary part of life, given that human beings are not born with a full intellectual capacity for reason and understanding. Sometimes, we HAVE to be primative when dealing with the primative mind.

The only reason I'm getting into any of this bullshit is to placate the "Beat your kids, it's good for them!" crowd of morons. Listen, you idiots, I know that not all corporal punishments are created equal. I know that saying "spanking is bad" is just as much an oversimplified generalization as saying that spanking is good, which is something most of you DON'T get. The idiots who spout "violence is never the answer" are complete and total fucking imbeciles with no real life experience, only flowery bullshit philosophy. Of course violence is not always the answer, but there is a time and place for it. Sometimes, violence IS the answer!

Such was the case in this story. A bad parent was attempting to wield his authority in an unreasonable and unjustifiably violent manner. This being the case, the 16yo girl was left with only one choice: Violence. She used violence to defend herself and she was CORRECT in choosing to do so. Violence was the answer and I applaud her for knowing it, though truth be told, she wasn't acting out of reason, but out of emotion. She panicked and that was her reaction.

What does it say about our society that parents trigger the "fight or flight" response in their children? A parent smacking their kids hand in order to protect them is not something that triggers that response; it's not something where the child feels threatened or under attack. My point to you pro-spanking idiots is that I DO know there are situations were physical punishment (or prevention) is neccesary, but this case was not one of those times (in fact, most aren't). Unfortunately, as Mr. Bumble once said, "The law is an ass!" (It's Oliver, you uncultured shits). The law is indeed an ass for locking up a young girl whose only crime was to defend herself against a larger and stronger attacker.

The property rights of parents is all that this is about. Had the man closing in on her with a threat of violence not been her father, that man would be sitting in a fucking cell right now and she was would praised for fighting off her attacker! As it stands, she is a minor and nothing more than her father's property - a slave. We can't have those slaves fighting back against the master, now can we.

I spent a good deal of this rant showing, through reason and logic, that the father was NOT justified in his actions. I did this because I know the first response of every pro-spanking person would be that the father was justified in trying to spank his daughter to begin with. No, he wasn't, and I've demonstrated that. Since his attack - and that's what it is, let's not mince words - was unjustified and, indeed, was a form of retribution, not discipline, the only logical conclusion is that the girl was justified by whatever action she chose to take. In fact, had the girl pulled out a gun and shot her father, I would reach the exact same conclusion.

I, for one, hope this starts a trend. I hope more young people will respond to violence with violence. Many will say that I'm encouraging the destruction of the "traditional family" and to that I say you're goddamn right I am! When the vast majority of child abusers are parents, it is starkly clear that the traditional family is exactly the sort of place where bad things happen.

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