Think outside the box, then rape the box, shit in the box and light it on fire, then rape it again.
Lord Galen
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Trapped In Homophobeland
April 20, 2008

Dear Galen

I'm 18 and I'm gay. That wouldn't be such a problem if lived in a tolerant country, but I do not.

I live in a small Eastern European country where homosexuality is abhorred and thought of as a sickness.

I can't "come out" because if did that I would be unable to finish school and get a job.

Gay people a discriminated against on every turn, I know stories of people failing exams in college just because they were gay. But that's not all - known gay people are beaten regularly and the police doesn't do anything about it.

I think my family wouldn't accept me. I'd spend my life going to one shrink to the next if I told them (in my country homosexuality is still considered a mental disease).

I have no one to turn to. I feel uncomfortable in other people's company because they might find out, I have no real friends, I'm depressed and I've put on weight, my grades are sinking.

So please tell me to stop being a pussy and man up and accept my life as a closet married with children bottom or I'm gonna kill myself.


Dear Queer,

Surprisingly, my advice is not for you to stop being a pussy and "man up." I, of all people, know what it's like to live in region permeated by ignorance and just plain stupidity. After all, I live on the planet Earth and am an exceptionally intelligent individual. These two things aren't generally found together.

The only thing you're ever going to be able to do to make yourself happy is to get the fuck OUT of that retarded back-water country! Your problem isn't all that different from the problem faced by gays, transsexuals, etc. every day all over the world. I know one tranny who is certain her parents will hate and disown her when she eventually reveals that she's not their "son" at all. Same problem with you, only you have the added weight of your whole country turning against you instead of just your whole family. I'll tell you the exact same thing I tell that tranny friend: Anyone who cannot accept you as you are is not a person worth keeping in your life, no matter who they are to you. This advice applies to entire nations as well as families and friends. Leave now and never look back.

It's not like it's fucking hard to find a more liberal country in Europe, for fuck's sake! Hell, you could probably find one that would give you political asylum for being gay! However you do it, just tell your family and friends that you want to do some travelling before settling down and starting your life (wife, kids, etc). When you're safely home in a new and tolerant land, contact them and tell them the truth. Make it clear that you left and you're not coming back. If they want to see you again, they can come visit; if not, it's their loss and you'll not be returning to that fucking shithole of a country where you're considered subhuman by a bunch of ignorant backwater hicks!

Here's the part where you can "man up" my friend. You need to get it through your cock-loving little head that you are BETTER than all of those people who look down on you! I recognize the syndrome you're suffering from. I call it Trash Heap Syndrome. It's a condition where you have grown up in a society which, consciously or not, dumps all of its trash on top of you. Growing up, you had it pounded into your brain that homosexuals are sick, evil, perverted, etc, etc, etc, ad nauseum. One of the problems with the typical human mind is that it tends to be pliable. After you've been told something over and over and over and over again by everyone around you, you start to believe it. Granted, YOU (the conscious thinking part of your mind) may not believe it, but the primal reactive part of you (that little voice inside) can't help but buy into all that crap. You're torn between intellectually knowing that there's nothing wrong with you, and instinctually feeling that you're pure scum. Subconsciously, you don't leave because you think you deserve to feel like this. You're less than human and you should suffer the punishment of being such.

This is bullshit and now that I've pointed out this flaw in your reactive thinking, perhaps you can face it and correct it. Being at the bottom of society's trash pile is more a badge of honor than the Mark of Cain. One of my favorite TV preachers (from back in my religious days) once said something very profound that's always stuck with me: "When people throw trash on you, shake it off, stomp on it, and use it to rise to the top!" Credit to TV Pastor John Hagee for that one (it's one of the few intelligent things he's ever said). What the Pastor is saying there, my flaming little friend, is that you have two choices. You can either lay down and just let the flow of society's garbage bury you alive, OR you can take that pain into yourself; absorb it, consume it, FEED on it, and let it drive you always! From great pain and suffering comes great people! At least, the ones who know how to use it to better themselves. What doesn't kill you CAN make you stronger, but only if you choose that path.

It's all up to you, bro. You can stay there and whine and make excuses about why you could never leave your homeland, family, best friend, dog, job, whatever, or you can do exactly what you wanted ME to tell you to do: MAN THE FUCK UP! Stop your snivelling and fix the fucking problem. You're surrounded by profound idiocy and, unlike most of us, you have the chance to crawl out of it. Climb up out of society's sewers and join us here in the modern world where, stupid though folks may be, they're better than where you live.

So go! Suck dicks all the way across the fucking continent if you want. There's a better place and a better life out there waiting for you, but you gotta seize it.

Alternatively, you could always stay and fight. Those of us who don't have the luxury of running to a better place (because the idiocy we have to deal with is everywhere) are left with only that choice. If you go that route though, in your shithole country, you better be a tough motherfucker. I don't envy you the task of trying to fight this.

Good luck, ya faggot!

Rimming Hatred's Asshole,
Lord Galen

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