A casual stroll through the lunatic asylum shows that faith does not prove anything.
-Nietzsche
Lord Galen
Home  •  Classic Home  •   •  Forum  • 






Short
URL
Archive 2008:           2008 Archive Index           Main Archive Index

Another Best Friend Love Story
March 31, 2008


Dear Galen


To get right the point....I have these intimate feelings for my best friend. I know it's fucking wrong and it just can't be, but I can't seem to get over him. I'm in the "closet" living the single life...he's got a girl and a kid and claims he's str8. We hang out a lot, and basically best friends all the way around.....but there were times we went beyond "that line" and have gone all the way. I figure to him it's just a "thing" that happened, but to me it's more than that - it meant something to me. I know it's fucking wrong and it can never be, and I want to get past this situation I am in. I've tried to cut him off but he always drifts back into my life, and like a retard there I go again getting myself in the same predicament all over again. I am hauling ass down this dark narrow road to no where. Living a life of lies and fixing to hurt myself in the process. I hate myself for not having the ability to just say "No...fuck this shit ~ it ain't happening no more". How can I totally get this behind me. I can't move away. I can't find another like him in this dinky little town ~ it's not that easy. I feel helpless....MKA.

Signed,
Anonymous


Dear Gaynonymous,

Your belief that your best friend is interested in you deep down inside, is nothing but wishful thinking. He's not. Get it out of your head right now.

The idea that "everyone is secretly gay" or that everyone CAN be gay if the right circumstance comes along is a homosexual myth, created by insecure fags to make themselves feel more "normal" with being gay. It's really a pathetic and defeatist attitude. On the one hand, you've got every homosexual in the world saying "ZOMG IT'S NOT A CHOICE, WE'RE BORN THIS WAY, IT'S NATURAL!!111!!" but then you've got most of those same dickheads claiming that heterosexuals could be turned gay or can be secretly gay. It doesn't work both ways. Your sexual orientation is not a choice, nor is your friend's. You're gay, he's straight, the end.

That being said, it's also very natural for this to happen. He's your best friend, dude. Male and female best friends fall in love all the time; you think it's different with you? Like, cuz you're gay that makes you somehow immune to the laws of attraction to which we are all subject?

I was in love with my best friend once. She and I had been best friends for many years and I desperately wanted more with her. She didn't. Sort of the same situation you're in, only not gay. Well, I eventually told her how I felt. She knew and things went on as normal. We're still good friends today. She's a wife and mother of two now and lives in Florida. As it turns out, it's a good thing we didn't hook up. I'm pretty happy with the wife I have now and she seems to be pretty happy with her husband and two beautiful girls. It all worked out for the best with us, because we didn't let it consume us. I didn't let my love for her rule over my life to the exclusion of all else, and she didn't let it make her uncomfortable that I had those feelings for her.

I don't think this would happen with your friend. Guys, even tolerant understanding ones, tend to be a little creeped out by men having gay crushes on them. I don't think that a man could be so secure with himself to know that you love him romantically and continue being your best friend.

My advice to you is to keep your fucking mouth shut unless there's a cock in it, which belongs to the next boyfriend you have, who actually IS gay and who you can actually HAVE a chance at a relationship with. Go find yourself a good GAY man, you flamer, and leave the straights alone. It's a road to heartbreak and disaster.


With mock-homophobia burning bright,
Lord Galen


Archive 2008:           2008 Archive Index           Main Archive Index