Wizard's Sixth Rule: The only sovereign you can allow to rule you is reason.
-Terry Goodkind
Lord Galen
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John Walsh is a Fucking Asshole
October 1, 2005


A good companion to this rant that you might want to read first is my Stranger Danger rant from last year. Packed full of those little things I like to called "facts." Which is something you won't hear from John Walsh.

So, here's how Walsh's life went. He was managing a hotel or some stupid shit like that (y'know, basically a dead end job) until he went to Sears one day and was apparently too fucking incompotent to keep an eye on his son, Adam. As luck would have it (bad luck, that is), Adam got snatched by some fucking nutbar and killed. Later, they found Adam's head in a canal, but never found his body.

So, what does John Walsh do about this? He goes on a fucking mission to distort the truth for all of America. Oh, you don't believe me? You think poor Mr. Walsh is a great guy who's done a lot to help kids? Well that's why I'm a god and you're a fucking idiot!

Lie #1 from Mr. Walsh was where he went on and on about how some evil pedophile kidnapped his son, used him for his sick purposes, and then killed him. Gee, I wonder, how the fuck could John have reached such a conclusion? I mean, there was no body to test for sexual abuse and the man who was always believed to have killed Adam had no history of sexual deviance (none that I can find, at least; if I'm wrong on that, someone please let me know). If fact, Ottis Toole was a straight-up serial killer. He killed because he was a dumbass whackjob, not because he was a sicko pervert child molester.

Could it be that maybe Mr. Walsh just wasn't satisfied with having his son kidnapped and beheaded? Maybe he just figured that throwing in the dreaded "p-word" would make it sound even worse. And maybe that makes him a sensationalist media whore and a lying fuckbag! Seriously, right from the start, this asshole just made up whatever "facts" suited him! I gotta say too, that it's pretty fucking sick. I mean, if I were in his place, I think things would look bad enough without the first thought jumping into my mind "oh man, I bet he fucked my kid too!" Jesus fucking Christ, Walsh is a damn sick bastard!

And then let's move on to his wonderful fucking career. I saw a commercial recently where he's releasing a "Stranger Safety" video for kids. If you haven't read my Stranger Danger rant linked at the top, now's a good time to go read it.

Mr. Walsh, I have a question. When are you going to release a "Family Danger" video? The stats that I'm looking at right here in front of me show that strangers aren't really that much of a danger at all. In fact, it's families that tend to dehumanize, mistreat, beat up, molest, and murder their children! So, Mr. Walsh, when do kids get a video that covers THAT, you self-righteous son of a bitch?!


And that's pretty much what it amounts to, right there! His son was one of the vast minority of kids who get hurt by a stranger, so that's his fucking mission. Nevermind that SO MANY MORE kids are being abused every fucking day by their mom or dad or uncle or older sibling or cousin or whatever! Oh no, FUCK THEM! Those kids just don't fucking matter; not if you're John Walsh! The only ones that mean a damn thing are the tiny percentage that get hurt by a stranger.

"But Galen, he does do a lot of good... What about the Center for Missing and Exploited Children? He runs that, isn't it good?" Oh no now, don't get me wrong. I'm not saying that the man does nothing good at all. Sure, if you've been kidnapped and molested by a total fucking stranger, then John Walsh is definately the man you wanna hear coming for you! If you're being held against your will and force to make kiddie porn for a living, then John Walsh is damn sure the guy I'd wanna see opening up the cage to let me out!

But if your cousin slips his dick between your little 10yo ass cheeks every Sunday at Grandma's house, what the fuck has John Walsh done for you? Does he even give that any thought? If your dad tells you stick that big vibrating toy up between your legs while he runs the video camera, where the fuck is John Walsh? I'll tell you exactly where he is. While you're face-down getting a rim job from Grandpa, he's in a big fancy studio making a video to tell you that you should shit yourself and run away screaming if a guy in a car stops and asks you for directions!

John Walsh isn't the solution, he's PART OF THE FUCKING PROBLEM! The problem is NOT how many strangers snatch kids and chop their heads off. Look, I'm genuinely fucking sorry for what happened to Adam Walsh (seriously), but enough is ENOUGH! Walsh, stop using your goddamn celebrity and your son's death to publicly crucify every fucking "stranger" in the world, while millions upon millions of kids get daddy's finger in their asshole every fucking night and YOU DON'T DO SHIT for them!

John Walsh does a great job helping the thousands of kids who are abused or kidnapped by strangers every year in this country, but he completely fucking ignores the several million kids who have even worse shit happening to them in their own fucking homes.

Fuck John Walsh. Hell, I've never met the guy so he's a stranger to me. And you know how evil those fucking strangers are.....



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