War is rich old men protecting their property by sending middle class and lower class young men off to die. It always has been.
-George Carlin
Lord Galen
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You'll Understand When You're Older
July 10, 2005

A lot of the problem that I notice with spreading the message of Youth Rights is that, naturally, most advocates of YR are young people themselves, so when they try to engage in a discussion about the things they believe in, they get dismissed by the adults around them with "You'll understand when you're older why X is wrong."

"I think the voting age should be lowered."
"Well, it shouldn't be. That's just stupid."
"Why shouldn't it be?"
"Look, kid, you'll understand when you're older."

Same conversation repeats itself for the drinking age, the defense against those who want to raise the driving age, curfew laws, etc. Well, I think I've sat back and listened to quite enough of this bullshit now. I have a question for everyone who's ever made this retarded statement to a young person:

They'll understand when they're older? Hey pal, I'm almost 30. Just how old do you have to be before you understand?

No, I mean it, really. How fucking old is old enough to understand when you're being treated like shit because of your age? There must be some "magic age" for this, cuz the AARP is full of old fuckers contantly bitching about being treated unfairly due to their age. So I'm guessing the magic age where wisdom comes is somewhere between 18 and 60.

Or maybe it's not so much age as "experience" which you think should automatically be associated with age, right? You want life experience before someone is qualified to judge when something in life is fucking unfair and should be changed instead of ignored? Ok, lemme just think about what you old dicks might consider to be valuable life experience....

Marriage? Ok, I got that one. Married for almost 5 years now.

Kids? None of my own, but does the several thousand I've cared for over the past decade count for anything? It should. I've dealt with more shit involving kids than any parents have ever had to handle with just their kids alone.

A job? While I confess that I have *never* held a typical 9 to 5 job, let's take a look at some of my former employment skills, shall we? I've been...
-- An assistant auto-mechanic
-- Concessions Manager at a little league ballfield
-- Youngest member of that ballfield's Board of Directors (at age 19)
-- A summer camp counselor at a camp for blind children and adults (in case you scoff at that... it was a 24/7 job (literally) and involved dealing with a LOT of "special" cases. When you've had to shower off a 47yo retarded man after he's wet the bed at 4:30am, then you can scoff at that job, bitch. Or maybe you'd rather clean up the 15ft wide puddle of vomit left by a severely retarded 16yo? Or maybe making sure that the 30yo who just shit himself has cleaned his ass properly would be more fun for you? I didn't think so, fucker)
-- A PC technician/secretary/interpreter/tech. support guy/personal assistant to CEO (all at once)
-- Computer teacher at a school for the deaf (I was paid to teach this high school class, but stayed on as a volunteer for the younger kids even afterward)
-- A Substitute Teacher at a rural Elementary School, grades Pre-K to 4th (this is where I've been at for the past 3 years and I'm quite happy there).
-- Is that enough work experience for you, dickhead?

Own a car? I can't drive, HA! But my wife does own a nice 2002 Saturn.

Own a home? Not just yet... We're buying one, but right now we're still in the same apartment that we've lived in for almost 3 years now (and have never even been late with a payment).

Paid Taxes? Hahaha... Hey asshole, the Social Security Administration has this fucked up idea that I owe them money. Thanks to this, they take every bit of my taxes every year. I get no refund, so fuck you.

Learned hard painful lessons about life? Heh... Why do you think I'm so bitter and hateful? Hahahahaha!

I think that's enough? Any more criteria or have we sufficiently confirmed that I am indeed a real live adult? Now that that's out of the way, I'd like to ask the fucking question one more time. Just how old-- no... Just how much do you have to fucking go through before you're qualified to stand up and say THIS FUCKING SUCKS!

They'll understand when they're older? No, they won't. If it's wrong now, it'll be wrong ten years from now. Your fucking problem is that you KNOW it's not fair and not right. You know it sucked ass when you were young and the only advantage you have over today's youth is that you don't have to fucking suffer through it anymore.

Or how about this wonderful line that kids get so often: "It's for your own good." NO IT ISN'T! Really, it's not, ever. When adults say "It's for your own good" what they mean is "It's the way *I* want it to be, so you'll just have to live with it."

So what makes me so fucking different? What makes me not an ageist prick like so many of you other adults? It's simple: I haven't forgotten. I didn't hit 21 and say "Well, that's all the restrictions gone now, guess I'll just forget about all the bullshit treatment I've suffered for the past 21 years" like all of you assholes did. I didn't forget what it was like to prove my parents wrong in an argument only to be told that I'm "back talking" them. What the fuck? I get punished for being RIGHT? Oh no, I haven't forgotten that and I'm not about to. I haven't forgotten getting harrassed by a cop for smoking in the bowling alley at age 17 and having to lie to him and say that I was 19. I shouldn't have HAD to lie; it was none of his (or your) fucking business what I put into my body. I haven't forgotten how my dad put a cigarette in his mouth and lit it right before he told me that he'd beat my ass if he ever caught me smoking again. All this shit (and my parents were GOOD parents!) is shit that I can not EVER fucking forget and you should all be ashamed of yourselves for forgetting it. I will not forget and you are all assholes for forgetting what it was like to be young and under the thumb of those who were older than you.

"But Galen, we have to protect our children. We know what's best for them." Bullshit! Sometimes you do, sometimes you DON'T! The trouble is that you don't really *know* when something's best for them and when it's not anymore than they do. Oops, I'm sorry, did I just let the big parenting secret out of the bag? Here, let me say it a bit louder: PARENTS DON'T KNOW ANY MORE ABOUT BEING A PARENT THAN KIDS DO! It's all guess work. Parents are just trying to do the right thing, but they focus so hard on being good parents that they forget what it was like to be a kid. They belittle and talk down to their children. They treat their kids like fucking property and enough is enough!

So... they'll understand when they get older? Is that right? Take a look at this 27yo, you spineless turd. I'm older and I still don't get it. Actually, that's not true. I *do* get it, I just don't fucking want it!

You can all keep your goddamn ageism and adult superiority. I'm not interested in joining your fucking elite little club of people who think they're better than kids. I'm not "better" than anyone... except you. Fuck you.

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