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Annie's PC Bullshit
May 29, 2005


Last night, I was sitting back relaxing and looking for something to watch on TV. I eventually settled on the Hallmark Channel since they were playing the new versions of two classic movies. At 8, I watched the 1998 remake of the classic "The Parent Trap." Gotta say that little Lindsay Lohan did a shitload better job than that dumbass little brat, Hayley Mills. I laughed my fucking ass off at that movie.

So anyway, that movie ended and along came the 1999 remake of "Annie." My advice is to not watch this movie. The original was a shitload better. For one thing, the girl who played Annie in this new version (Alicia Morton) totally SUCKED ass at it. That link I gave with her name makes it sound like she did a great job; don't believe it! Well, I mean, it's not like she was a terrible actress in general, but she just didn't suit the role of Annie. Annie is supposed to be a street-tough little smart-ass, not a big fucking baby! I guess I should blame the director for that one though. The original (1982) movie version of Annie was a whole lot better; and that's saying something, cuz it flopped big-time!

But, actually, I'm not here today to write about the horrid rendition of Annie. I'm here today to write about the horrid PC add-on that came in this new version. They made Daddy Warbucks' assistant black. She was never black in any other version (hell, I don't even remember him really having an assistant in the other one). Yet in this movie she was black. Not only black, but romatically insteresting in Daddy Warbucks. In fact, at the end of the movie, Warbucks ends up giving her a ring (to propose to her, though that was never directly stated). They're all gonna be one big happy family now....

And none of us are supposed to question that a white billionare in the 1930s is gonna hook up with a black woman? What the fuck? That shit was a fucking insult to my intelligence. Disney just decided they'd be fucking PC as they could and throw in some color. That's one thing, although it was bad enough that having this "assistant" working so closely with Warbucks on a personal level and being a black woman stuck out like Andre The Giant in Munchkin Land! No, it wasn't enough that they had to shove their tacky PC add-on down our throats, they just HAD to take it that one step further and have Warbucks fall in love with her.

No, it's not a problem that there was a black person in the film. The problem is that Disney looked at this classic and said "Hey, there's no people of color here... let's add one, cuz we're PC dumbasses and it's not enough to just leave shit alone, we've gotta fuck it up somehow cuz we don't want black people getting offended that there's no blacks in this movie!" Then some lame-ass popped up and said "Hey, here's an even better idea! Let's have her and Warbucks end up together after they've flirted for the entire movie! The blacks are sure to be appeased then!" Fuck you, Disney! Damn PC bullshit attitudes! All of you know that this decision came about because the rich white executives at Disney are afraid of the blacks, so they go completely overboard to placate them; nevermind the fact that there aren't any blacks pissed off about the lack of "color" in Disney movies. Ok, maybe there's a few, but they're nuts too.

It just fucking pissed me off and really ruined the movie more than it already had been. It was a fucking insult to my intelligence that they think they can just seamlessly integrate a black person into a 1930s setting and pretend like there were no racial issues back then. She stuck out like Jerry Falwell at a Green Peace rally and it was fucking insulting.

They *could* have just left it alone. If not for the romantic aspect, I wouldn't have even noticed their PC bullshit. It occurred to me just a minute ago that there was also a black orphan and a hispanic orphan, iirc. I didn't even notice that until I was writing this rant and thinking about it. Blacks and hispanics didn't share the same orphanages as white children in the 1930s, yet they managed to make it seem perfectly natural. So why the FUCK couldn't they have done that with Warbucks' assistant? Cuz they just HAD to push that PC envelope the extra mile. Frankly, I found the whole thing a lot more racist and patronizing toward blacks than if they'd just left the cast all white.

Don't see the 1999 Disney version of Annie. It sucked in ways that only a super-PC piece of shit movie could.



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