Letter to Bush
First off, congratulations on your victory in the recent election. The majority of the American people voted for you (this time) and so your victory was deserved. This, I concede.
However, let's not play coy here, Mr. Bush. You and I both know that the majority of the American people are ignorant little groupthink sheep who will believe whatever you tell them to believe as long as you keep throwing God around like your own personal PR deity. We both know that if the majority of Americans could manage to have an independant thought about something other than the color of their new SUV, you'd be fucked. You got in office the first time by some really scuzzy tactics and even the votes you got legitimately were earned by your father's reputation, not you. Your father was actually a half-way decent President. He was a lying sack of shit, but he did the job fairly well so I'll give him credit for that much, at least.
Mr. Bush, I'm delivering fair warning to you. Don't think this election has won you anything. All it's earned you is another four years to keep trying to pull the same bullshit you've been trying to pull for the last four years.... and guess what? We, that minority of Americans who know how to use our brains and refuse to just accept whatever you tell us as Gospel - WE will be right there next to you the whole way for these next four years. Every freedom you try to take away, we'll be there to put you back on your fat ass. Every civil liberty you try to crush, we'll be right there under your boot, holding it up to keep you from crushing a damn thing. And for every single word of the U.S. Constitution that you try to circumvent, you'll find us standing on all sides of that precious doctrine just waiting to turn you around.
The point, Mr. President: We're not going anywhere. You haven't beaten anyone and you most certainly are NOT fooling anyone in this free-thinking minority!
Oh yes, I know... If you actually bother to read this, you're probably laughing to yourself and thinking about how we didn't do much good against you on November 2nd.... Well, Mr. President, the election was a whole different ball game. That was the one night when you got to let all the sheep out of their pens and send them to the polling stations. Of course they'd all vote for you....because you told them to and following the orders of an authority figure is all they know how to do. You're a "good Christian man" who tells them everything they want to hear and so they follow.
We're the part you DON'T control though. That must really piss you off that there's a part of this country that stands outside your control; a sector of society that your psychological warfare didn't work on. I really must commend you on that before I go on. You've made America hated by most of the planet, ruined the economy, wasted billions of dollars and thousands of American lives on a war with no purpose, tried repeatedly to either remove, circumvent, or make exceptions to our Constitutional Rights, imprisoned Iraqis (and even American citizens) in Guantanamo Bay under conditions that would never be allowed under the law here in the States..... but still they follow you and think you're just swell. Really, sir, I admire that about you, if nothing else. Jeez, you've got them all so mindfucked, they'd walk straight into the concentration camps at your behest. Shit, you've even arrested those like me for trying to spread the truth about you at political rallies! That's an awesome piece of work you've got there. If I ever decide to take over the world, I'll be sure to model myself after you.... of course, you're doing exactly what Hitler and Ceasar did before you, so I guess maybe you don't deserve the credit after all.
The point of this letter is just to let you know, Mr. President, that you haven't broken us. Sure, we were a little depressed and defeatist right after you won, but we're over it. We ARE still here and we WILL continue to fight you every step of the way, just like we have for the past four years and just like we'll continue to do for every smartass old fart who thinks he's smart enough and slick enough to pull the wool over America's eyes..... Yeah, you're doing a great job at that, but we're still here.... we are still here!
I imagine that you'll continue to shock me over the course of the next four years. I can see the battles coming as you try to write your religious beliefs into the Constitution (gay marriage, abortion, etc) and garner the support of the ignorant masses to back you up. Just so long as YOU remember, sir, that four years is a long time.... long enough to educate more people about you and tip the scales among the Citizens of this country to make sure that you're kind doesn't fool them again.
Don't bother writing to me. I'm not interested in any of your bullshit. This letter is just to put you on notice that we're still here and you'll NEVER beat us!
Oh, and since I know how the Secret Service and Homeland Security are about such things, lemme just give some disclaimers here:
Secret Service: Just because I hate the President with a passion doesn't mean that I intend any harm toward him. Well, not physical harm, at least; I certainly would enjoy seeing a whole lot of political harm thrown his way! I'm not going to kill the President; hell I don't even want to see him dead at all. I want him to be very much alive and well to see his bullshit exposed and to see us defeat him at every turn. So, stay off my doorstep, you douchebags.
Homeland Security: No, I'm not a terrorists, I don't know any terrorists (except for our President) and I don't support terrorists in any way whatsoever. Don't bother trying to pull your "unpatriotic/anti-Bush = terrorist" bullshit with me. I love the country I was born in and I love the country founded on July 4, 1776; I just hate the one that Bush has created in the here and now. I'm not un-American, you are.
And that's all I have to say on the matter...... Well, not really, but I'm tired of writing now.