Each nation knowing it has the only true religion and the only sane system of government, each despising all the others, each an ass and not suspecting it.
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I Got Kicked Out of College


Thatís right, Iím a two-bit loser! I got kicked right the fuck out of college and now Iím here to bitch about it.

Trouble is, it wasnít my fault. I got really seriously fucked over and I donít even know why! Yeah, I know, everybody says it wasnít their fault when they get booted, but think about whoís writing this. Why the fuck would I have any reason to lie? Iíd tell you bastards the truth and tell you to suck it if you donít like it! Hahahaha!

Well, hereís the story. Iím sitting in the computer lab one morning before classes. I was just checking my e-mail and checking the Guestbook entries for a couple of sites I was running at the time. No big deal, right? All of a sudden, one of the instructors who teaches in that building comes over and asks Ė correction, demands Ė that I come with her immediately. Ok, Iím wondering what the fuck this is about. She escorts me outside where I find a campus security officer waiting and the two of them escort me to the administration building and into the office of the Vice Principal of Student Affairs. At this point Iím thinking ďWhoa, what the hellÖ They must think I key the Deanís car or some shitÖĒ I mean, they were treating me like some kind of criminal! What the fuck did I do? So, Iím sitting in the reception area of the VPís office and the old bitch who brought me up there is inside talking to him. I couldnít make out everything, but I did manage to make out enough to tell what I was apparently being accused of: Porn. They thought I was surfing porn in the fucking computer lab???

Anyway, so a few minutes go by and the bitch comes out. She and the rent-a-cop leave and the VP calls me into his office. I start out right away by saying that I heard what she said I supposedly did and that itís not true. He tells me that several students witness me surfing porn in the computer lab as well as the teacher who brought me in. I tell him that I donít know what they think they saw, but that we can straighten this out right now. I stood up and told him to come with me down to the computer lab and he could look at the history for himself. He seemed a pissed that Iíd even suggest such a thing and told me Ė his exact words Ė ďIíll decide if thatís necessary.Ē Heíll decide? Well, excuse the fuck outta me for wanting to prove myself innocent in 5 five easy minutes, asshole!

Youíd think that my solution was a pretty simple one, right? Oh, no! Iím told to leave campus right away and to report back to his office in 3 days. During those three days, the tech department would investigate it and Iíd know something when I returned. I gave it a rest at that because I thought that since I was innocent, I had nothing to worry about (yes, I really WAS that fucking naÔve).

So, three days go by and I return as scheduled expecting to find an apology waiting for me. Instead, what I find is a stack of porno pictures that I had apparently been looking at. Hard copies, printed out and thrown down on the desk in front of me. I picked them up, looked through them briefly and told him Iíd never seen those pictures before in my life. I told him that I wanted to see the logs that linked ME to those pictures. He hands me some server logs that show a whole string of URLs Iíve never seen before. I told him that this isnít evidence and that he couldíve browsed these sites himself and printed out the pics and logs for all I could tell!

It was hopeless though. I argued my best, but theyíd already decided I was guilty. I donít know why or what good it did them, but thatís how it went. I followed the Student Handbook to the letter and submitted a written request for an Appeal. I never heard another word back from them.

So, fair warning to everyone living in the mid-Georgia area whoís thinking about attending Central Georgia Technical College (formerly Macon Technical Institute) Ė DONíT! Donít waste your fucking time! Itís run by a bunch of lying pricks who donít give a ratís ass about you. If you currently attend that school Ė transfer!

How can I say this? Well, I know that I didnít do anything. I know this, even if I can never prove it Ė I know it. Yet, despite this fact, there was somehow evidence of me surfing porn sites! How the fuck can there be evidence of something that did NOT happen? Thereís only one way and thatís for someone to make up the evidence. It couldnít have been an honest mistake because there was evidence of something that never happened! Evidence of a non-existing event doesnít just appear out of thin air or by ďaccidentĒ it gets created.

Oh, and for the record, I happen to think porn is fucking retarded. Why the hell do I wanna watch other people doing shit? Itís not me doing it, so whatís the fucking point?! Youíll find this odd but to be perfectly honest, porn doesnít even get me hard. Seriously, whatís so erotic about somebody OTHER than me getting laid? Not a damn thing. Porn is for pussies!

Now, for my pleasure and amusement, hereís some information for you about the guy who fucked me over:

Dr. Eddy Dixon
Vice President, Student Services
(478) 757-3508
evd@centralgatech.edu


Since this information is publicly available on the CGTC website, itís not like Iím invading his privacy by posting this, now is it? Feel free to send him a nasty e-mail or give him a call. Donít expect him to know who the fuck I am though (even if he reads this), because if he did it to me, heís probably done it to lots of people!

Now, a personal message to Dr. Dixon: Iíd like to thank you, sir, for fucking up my ongoing education. Iíd like to thank you for all your lies and all the bullshit you put me through. Iíd like to thank you for being one of the biggest fat-ass lying sacks of shit Iíve ever had the displeasure to meet! Oh gee, was that libel? I guess youíre gonna have to sue me then. Just keep in mind that if you do that, Iíll be forced to get a lawyer and then all your bullshit is gonna come out in court. So, sue me, motherfucker, go ahead. Ah, but you canít. See, in order for that to be libel it would have to be a false statement. Itís not. You know it and I know it and any half-assed lawyer can prove it. Besides, I donít have shit to sue for anyway. Youíd be waiting a long damn time to get paid, asshole. Remember, I got kicked out of college, what kind of money do you think I have? Send me an e-mail, Dixon, Iíd love to hear from you.

And on that note:


Dr. Dixon, suck my balls, you fat lying fuck!


"Fools are the only folk on Earth who can absolutely count
on getting what they deserve."

-Stephen King