Loyalty to petrified opinion never broke a chain or freed a human soul.
-Mark Twain
Lord Galen
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Benedict Hornball

Dear Galen


Man, I fucked up big time! I need some help fast! Ok, check this out. I slept with my best friend's little sister! I was spending the night at my friend's house and he already fell asleep, so me and his sis were just kinda hanging out (she's only 2 years younger than me) and we just starting talking and shit. Next thing I know, I was bustin' a nut straight up in that shit!

That was all great and everything, but now I feel like I betrayed by best friend by nailing his sister. I think he's gonna be pretty pissed when he finds out.

-Benedict Hornball



Dear Back-stabbing Sonofabitch

First off, congratulations! Dude, you fuckin' scored, way to go! You sound young, so it probably doesn't happen that often.

Secondly, sorry if you lose your friend over this, but it'll be a shitload worse if you try to hide it from him. He'll find out eventually (no way around that, so forget that shit right now).

Just be honest and up-front about it. Tell your friend what happened and if you want to keep seeing his sister, find out if it's gonna be a problem with him.

Whatever happens, be sure to let him know what a good piece of ass his little sis was! If she gave you any head, make sure you tell him about that too! And, especially, stick your finger in his face and say "Here dude, smell your sister."


All My Hate,
Galen