• What the fuck happened to your site?!
From 2004 to the end of 2015, my site was a beautiful work of art that was hand-crafted all on my own in a text editor. But, as the years went by, the amount of content I put out became less and less. Eventually, I had to choose an easier publishing platform than the one I built so that I could put out lots of little things instead of a few big things every once in a while. The old site is still there where I left it. If you’re longing for the past, go visit it and say hello.
• Why are you so mean?
Idiots have pissed me off for far too long. It’s about damn time I said something about it. The whole damn world scurries around like ants just doing what-the-fuck-ever and never seeing or even caring about half the shit that goes on.
The short and simple answer is: I’m mean because you’re stupid. Stop being so fucking stupid and I’ll stop being mean. I don’t imagine either will happen in my lifetime.
• What makes you right and everyone else wrong?
I hate when people ask this question. What fucking difference does it make? Everybody thinks they’re right about whatever opinions they hold. Why should I be different? The difference between me and you is that I don’t give a rat’s ass if you think I’m wrong. Your opinion is worthless to me.
• Why are you so arrogant? Get over yourself!
No. I’ve got nothing to “get over.” I’m the most intelligent person I’ve ever known and the world is packed full of people who are so absolutely unbelievably stupid that it makes me sick. I have *every* good reason to look down on everyone else. If people stop being idiots, then I’ll get over myself. Until then, you all deserve it, so fuck off!
• Why do you hate everyone?
I don’t hate anyone individually. People are mostly fine when taken as individuals, but when you put them all together you get this incredibly fucked up thing called “society.” Society fucking sucks, but the trouble is you can’t rid of it without killing everybody and that would just be dumb. So as long as society continues to be stupid, I will continue to be an asshole who bitches about it whether anyone cares or not. For further reference, please look up the word “misanthropy.”
• Galen, your site sucks dude!
Well, please allow me to apologize for my small pathetic attempt to make some kind of fucking difference in this shit-hole of a world not living up to your standards. When you grow the balls to put yourself and your opinions out there for the whole world to see, come back and talk to me about it. Until then, you’re just another critic whose opinion means nothing to me.
• Can I have an @snipeme.com e-mail address?
No. Stop asking. It’ll never happen. My wife is the only person besides me who’s allowed to have one. When you start living with me and fucking me, then maybe you can have one too. Also, yes, this applies to SnipeMe.net too.
• Why is snipeme.com spamming me?!
I’m not. I’ve never spammed and I never will. Recently, this site has been discovered by spammers. Not only have I started recieving all their bullshit, but I’ve also noted a significant amount of bounced e-mails that I never sent. All of these bounced e-mails which appear to have been sent from “…@snipeme.com” and all these e-mails are spam advertisments of some sort.
This is because of a simple process called “spoofing.” It takes nothing more than a simple php or perl script to fake an e-mail header and there are lots of spam programs out there that can even do it for you. I can easily send out an e-mail that appears to be from any address I want. Anyone with the technical know-how can do this and it is a favorite trick of spammers.
Please take note: SnipeMe.com absolutely DOES NOT send spam e-mails! I never have and I NEVER will! If you have recieved a spam message from a snipeme.com e-mail address, please inform me of it immediately! Also, please include the full text of the spam message and the full header of the e-mail.
ATTN SPAMMERS: No matter how much you spoof, the fact is that spam is a form of advertisement and all of your e-mails are advertising something. I may not be able to catch you, but I WILL target the company or website you’re advertising. Just keep that in mind, smart ass… just because I can’t get *you* doesn’t mean that I can’t get the people who pay you to spam for them and if I get them, you’re fucked!
• I think you’re a racist / pervert / pedophile / chauvinist pig / sissy / bastard / prick / asshole / etc, etc, etc, ad nauseum.
Good for you. Glad to see you have a fucking opinion. Go ahead and just assume that I’m everything you think I am and don’t bother visiting a website run by such a fucking [insert slur] anymore since it bothers you so much. Or, maybe it’s the fact that this [insert slur] is RIGHT (about everything) that bothers you? Sorry if the truth makes me such a [insert slur], but that’s your fuckin’ problem and I don’t need to hear about YOUR problems.
• Why didn’t you post the Guest Rant I submitted?
Maybe it sucked. Maybe it wasn’t long enough. Maybe a lot of reasons. The number one reason that I reject Guest Rants though is GRAMMAR! If your spelling, punctuation, and grammar suck ass, I’m going to delete your rant even if it’s worthy of a fucking nobel prize! I absolutely will NOT spend time cleaning up YOUR SHIT to make it worthy of MY SITE! Write like you’re NOT on the Internet, please!
And before you comment that *I* make mistakes and *I* use netspeak, just save it. That’s bullshit. Every “mistake” I make is just to make you feel better about being beneath me. I’m fucking perfect, now deal with it.
• Will you post a link to my site / trade links with me?
No. I do not honor link requests or link swaps ever. Link swapping is nothing but a form of cooperative spamming and I do not participate or endorse spam in any form whatsoever. No link swaps ever. Period.
• Why don’t you provide sources for all of your “facts?”
I am not your fucking secretary. I already know that the shit I write is 100% true. If you need convincing that I’m right, then here’s a suggestion for you: Google. One of the main purposes of this site is to make *you* think! You’re not SUPPOSED to just believe something because I said it! Just like you’re not supposed to believe ANYTHING just because somebody said it! It is YOUR job to go out, research a topic, and form your OWN opinion based on facts. Whether you agree or disagree with me, the burden is on YOU to go and search for the truth yourself, asshole! I already know what the truth is; now it’s your turn. Don’t fucking bother me about “proving” what I say. I’m a god, bitch! Prove it your own damn self!
• How can you reprint entire news articles? Isn’t that copyright violation?
Reprinting a news article by itself would be a copyright violation, absolutely. However, I’m not reprinting the articles for the purpose of disseminating the information in the article. I reprint them as a basis for critisizing the subject matter. Reprinting an article for the purpose of discussing or making a parody of the article is Fair Use. Fair Use is tricky ground though and the courts could go either way. Any copyright holder who wants me to remove their article should simply use the Contact form on this site and ask that I remove their content. Even though I believe my use of news articles is protected under Fair Use, I would still honor any request to remove copyrighted material, just as I would expect other websites to honor such requests by me. And, for the record, I’ve seen my rants reposted (in their entirety) on other websites. As long as I’m credited for the work and there’s a link to the original rant here on SnipeMe, I consider it Fair Use and don’t complain.
• You did [x] thing. Take it down or I’LL SUE YOU!
Living in the Land of Litigation where everyone seems to sue for everything, you may be under the impression that you’re gonna just run out and file a lawsuit against me for pissing you off. In the interest of full disclosure, I think it’s only fair that you know what you’re in for.
First of all, how much is in your bank account? I hope it’s a lot. On average, it costs $2,500 just to retain a lawyer. Your typical lawsuit costs about $10,000 or more by the time the whole thing is finished.
Secondly, how much is in *my* bank account? I mean, if you’re gonna sue me, you might be interested in knowing that. Y’see, a little known fact that most lawyers aren’t going to tell you is that around 80% of lawsuit “winners” never see a dime of their settlement. Why not? Simple, because around 80% of lawsuit “losers” are broke as fuck and simply don’t have any money to pay you with. Me? I’m a store clerk making $7.50 an hour. Thinking that maybe they’ll repo my house or car to pay you? The house is in my wife’s name; my name appears nowhere on the mortgage. The car is in my wife’s name; my name appears nowhere on the title.
Basically, Mr. I’ll-Sue-Your-Ass-For-All-You’re-Worth… I’m worth absolutely nothing in monetary terms.
The moral of the story is that if you want to shell out upwards of $10,000 to sue me and then end up with absolutely nothing if you win, go right ahead. I don’t have anything to be concerned about. Hell, you’ll have an easy victory because I won’t even contest the lawsuit! You’ll win by default when I don’t even fucking respond to the papers!
So go right ahead, cocksucker – SUE ME! Hell, there’s plenty of bitches who could probably nail me for libel and defamation of character (maybe you’re one of them). The guy from Sniper Radio 6 and 7 could sue me for that too. But will he? Will YOU? FUCK NO!
Ah, but I can hear the wheels still turning in that tiny head of yours. Right now, you’re thinking that if you can’t sue me, you’ll sue my webhost for keeping this content online. WRONG AGAIN, ASSFACE! Webhosting providers and ISPs are “common carriers” and, thus, are not legally responsible for the content hosted on their networks. Just like if I pissed you off over the phone, AT&T can’t be sued for it.
Yeah, sure, ok, send your little Cease and Desist letter and I’ll take a look at it. If *I* think you have a valid concern, I’ll remove the content. Otherwise…. Well, just read this page again.
Bearing all of this in mind, I hope you now see why you should simply go fuck yourself and leave me the hell alone. If you don’t like something on this site, print out the page, roll it up into a nice tight tube, apply some KY Jelly and SHOVE IT UP YOUR ASS!
• One of my loved one’s names is on your list of Under 21 Casualties in Iraq. I don’t like this. I want you to remove the name.
No. The names of military casualties is public information and a website like this one is regarded in the same legal light as any mainstream media publication. Ask yourself if a newspaper published the same list and you e-mailed them, what kind of response would you get? The Freedom of Information Act grants me the right to know and disseminate this information. I’m sorry for your loss, but I don’t care if the list bothers you. It’s not about you and it’s not about me. It’s about a hypocritical injustice committed by our government. I find it obscene that your loved one was mature enough to fucking die for this country, but was regarded as an immature little child when it comes to having a beer! That is INSULTING to their memory and you should be far more worried about that sick shit than about a list of publicly available names on my shitty little website. No names will be removed from that list. Not one. Ever. I’m very sad and sickened to report that the names just keep coming…
• When are you going to update your site next?!
It’s gonna be a long fucking time. At least, that’s what’s you should assume. That way, you won’t fucking bother me about it! Listen, you assholes, this site is 90% for me and 10% for your entertainment. And even the 10% that’s for you is only cuz I like the ego trip of being everyone’s favorite evil bastard, so when ya really think about it, that part’s for me too!
There’s nothing more annoying than getting e-mails asking when I’m gonna do the next Sniper Radio or write a new rant or whatever. Actually, yeah there is. Getting IMs from my friends about it is more annoying, definately! So listen up, all of you! I will update the fucking site when I’m good and goddamn ready and not one minute before!
At the time of this writing, I’ve been putting off releasing a new Sniper Radio episode simply because people won’t stop asking for it. I’m witholding it just to spite them. See, you assholes think that if you keep asking, I’ll put up something new just to shut you up. No. If you keep asking, I’ll take longer so that you’ll give up and THAT shuts you up just fine. With any luck, you’ll give up on my site completely and fucking go away because the odds are that I don’t want an annoying sack of camel shit like you hanging around anyway!
• Why didn’t you answer my Dear Galen letter? I really needed help with my boyfriend/girlfriend/blind date/whatever!
Go fuck yourself! I don’t do relationship advice unless it’s INTERESTING! If you have to ask “Is mine interesting?” then no, it isn’t. Sleeping with your teacher(s)? Send it! Fucking your best friend’s sister behind his back? Let’s hear about it!
Feeling insecure about your relationship status? Wonder if you’re being led on by that guy you met last week at Denny’s? Curious as to whether you have a future with the club-footed waitress you’ve been dating for 6 years? Wondering if you should break up with your significant other? I DON’T FUCKING CARE!!!!!!!! Jesus-jumped-up-motherfucking-Christ-in-a-basket-of-fish, FIGURE SOME OF THIS KINDERGARTEN BULLSHIT OUT ON YOUR OWN, FUCKTARDS!!!!
Send the letter if you want, but if it’s never responded to, then you motherfucking know why!